I had my last academic critique today. Well, as academic as you can get in a 200 level web design class.
I’m really, really almost finished now; what little I have left is just an exercise. The reception’s on Friday, which I suppose I’ll go to since I don’t have much else going on. Next week I have the final for the neuropsych survey class, to finish up my psychology minor. And that’s pretty much it. I’ll have a diploma mailed to my parents house in about four months or so.
I remember high school being similarly anti-climactic, although at the time I was pretty down about the whole thing anyway. Being an emotional and psychological wreck, not expecting to graduate in the first place, and not looking forward to the prospects afterward. I had no idea how to go about doing pretty much anything, and it was worse that I knew it. I had a vague idea of what I wanted to do, and I knew where my talents and skills were, but I had no clue how to do anything with them.
This time around I know exactly what I know how to do, and I’m aware of how to go about it. Zero confidence, but you know.. I’ve been through a lot of shit that proved confidence isn’t necessarily strength. People confuse them, but confidence is in the realm of persona and public affect. Charisma. Strength is what shows up when shit hits the fan, everything goes wrong, and you’re in some kind of desperate situation. It may not be pretty, but that’s what I’ve got.