Seriously, stop phoning in Transformers opinions.

This week has been full of halfhearted jabs at the Transformers movies.  To illustrate, I didn’t even know why this week all the lukewarm dislike appeared until IMDB told me the fourth one came out.

Well, okay.  I get that people love to hate Michael Bay.  He’s known for big, dumb explosions and cliched action filmwork that’s all SUMMER BLOCKBUSTER and no substance.  People were decrying him before the first one came out.  Look: it’s the fucking Transformers.  It’s  a cartoon from the ’80s about robots that turn into cars.  I know, I loved it as a child.  But as the Star Wars prequels showed us, if the new iteration ruined the old thing for you, you need to grow the fuck up and understand that 7-year-old you saw things differently.

I enjoyed the first Transformers movie.  It was big and dumb, and Optimus Prime turned into a truck, and that’s really all I asked of it.  I didn’t need Oscar-caliber acting or a seamless plot.  I’ll admit the second one was so bad I walked out, but part of that was the quick-cut camera work made it physically unpleasant to watch.  I didn’t care enough to see any more after that, but it doesn’t diminish the cartoon for me at all.

G.I.Joe: Rise of Cobra didn’t tarnish my childhood memories either.  Nor will Bay’s Ninja Turtles thing.  But let’s be honest; the old G.I.Joe and TMNT movies were really fucking bad, and if you go back and watch the shows… also pretty bad.  Both of those, I learned later on, were much better as comic series.  I understand that when something gets rebooted, fans want it to be an improvement.  The thing is, you’ll almost never see that with a feature film, because the production always ends up halfway between a “true to the source” rehash and making something inspired but different, and consequently failing at both.


That brings me to the weirder part of this latest batch of opinions.  The nerdrage is less rage than lip service.  Is it because we’ve all resigned ourselves to seeing it anyway but we still feel the need to bitch about it?  Does anyone actually still care enough to spit vitriol after four movies?  Are we all just falling asleep?

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Still here.

Until this year, the world cup has never been on my radar.  I mean this is the US, so understandably most of us don’t give a shit about soccer.  So I don’t know if this is the first time America’s done well there, or if it’s the amount of foreign people who come to my usual bar, or twitter, or if- by some unexplained phenomenon- American’s suddenly decided to care, but I can’t seem to escape it.

Hopefully this’ll be like the Olympics; annoying and overhyped while it’s happening, but almost immediately forgotten the second its over.


- Om Eco, the coffee place near me, wants to put my work up.  All because I left my card with one of the baristas, just because she was interested in my drawings.  They’re also looking for kitchen help, so I’ll apply and (seriously, cross your fingers) hopefully get a job.

- I applied to the Clifton Community Arts Center’s local artist show.  Five pieces submitted for $65, which is pricey, but at the moment I’m really down to the end of my savings; it’s kind of a last-ditch thing.



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My new social media rule.

At this point, I’m more interested in twitter than facebook, and since twitter is largely about meeting new people (rather than keeping ties with people I already know), it doesn’t really apply there.  But facebook…

Between the site itself (which is becoming irrelevant at the same speed that it becomes more intrusive and openly sketchy) and the amount of rhetoric that reaches me (thanks, family and aging peers who never left home), I’m hearing way more bullshit than I need to because it’s not being buried between asinine posts and game requests anymore.

So, from here on out: if you post political memes, parrot talking points, use the phrase “talking points”, use “God” more than once per sentence, or constantly post statements or argue in the comments instead of asking questions and discussing like a rational human being, I will no longer take you seriously in any context.

It’s not about having particular convictions or beliefs, or me disagreeing with your politics or anything else.  It’s about you readily subscribing to some ideology as your identity.  It’s narcisisstic and insecure, and it indicates that you’ve willingly given up your ability as a human being to think and consider for yourself, to empathize, or to compromise with other people.

Let me be clear.  It’s not about your politics or religion.


It’s about you being a lazy, willingly ignorant asshole.

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Rather than go a whole month again, I’ll just recap all the shit that isn’t long enough for its own post.

- I thought I had kidney stones last week.  I had that really uncomfortable twinge feeling for a few hours.  And then…nothing.  Well, no pain, anyway.

- I don’t give a fuck about soccer.  Usually this is not a thing, but apparently in Cinci some people do.  The internet suddenly seems to care.  FUCKIN WURLD CUP!!!!1  It’s a weird place to be.

- I’m struggling with a couple of commissions.  They should be coming along better, but every other day has started turning into mental health day.  Or mental hell day, if you will.  And I feel really fucking guilty about it, which is not helping.

- The Clifton Community Arts Center is having a local art show, which I’m hoping will be a good opportunity.  75 dollar fee for five pieces, but at this point it’s kind of down to the wire.  I still haven’t found a day job.  Not an interview, not a call, nothing.

I’m keeping my fingers crossed.

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I’ve had a few people ask why I don’t post on DeviantArt (and other places).

Well, I have.

I made a profile there way back when it was in beta, and I posted a bunch of work there a couple of years ago.  Much like etsy, I got a decent response five minutes after uploading something.  Then literally after a few minutes, the thing became swallowed by the flood of fanart and tentacles.

Aside from feeling a little weird about being under an umbrella with a billion teenagers drawing shipping pics of anime characters, it just felt too “fine art” to be there.  I’m not a snob about it, my stuff is also too “illustration-y/genre/unpolished” to fit in with fine art as well.  It straddles a line.

And there are plenty of good artists on deviantArt, but most of them work in the digital/photography realm.  With Etsy, I figured out pretty quick that people weren’t going there to buy paintings, they were there to buy t-shirts and ceramics and crafty things.  D.Art was more of a fan/cosplay showroom.  And no, mom- I’m not a woman and I don’t give a shit about fancy cakes or whatever so I’m not going to be on Pinterest.

I know I could concieveably utilize a number of those sites, but that’s a massive timesink for the chance to randomly get a view or two.  It’s much more valuable (and enjoyable) for me to use twitter/FB/actual people in real life to see what I do.

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Another rough week.

I set up at the art fair last Saturday, and it rained off and on; I had to pack up early when the rain started coming through the tent.  All total, I sold zero things but half my foot traffic took cards.  Unfortunately, that was three people.  On the upside I have a tent so I can do this fair thing again, and I’ve worked out the logistical issues (displaying loose canvas, etc.) so the next time I’ll be better prepared.

The website is up and updated, but a lot of the thumbnails are broken on the live site even though they work fine on browser test run through the editor.  I still need some help getting it to adjust to phones and tablets and so forth.

I had to take klonopin a couple of times last week, which both put me to sleep and gave me vivid dreams.  The one about Simone really threw me off the whole week; I just couldn’t shake off the emotional residue.

Applied for another cooking job, this one at the bar.  The bartenders like me, and Brianne said she’d put in a good word.  But after a year and a half I’m starting to believe “now hiring” signs are always just a cruel joke and expecting any sort of response is stupid.

We’ll see I guess.

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The pressure to dismantle net-neutrality, particularly in the US, has been growing for several years now.  It may be one of the most important fights that people anywhere have, because allowing ISPs to control the speed of a site’s download by charging money essentially allows them to control internet content, period.  And outside interests- lobbies, groups, the government itself- with enough money or power could easily control those ISPs.

This is a huge step in silencing the internet to everything but commercial purposes; the last real bastion of “free speech”.  The communication of dissent and the sharing of how to navigate and survive a society that has turned capitalism into an uncontrolled beast and our government into an oligarchy could be ended.

No doubt this sounds very conspiracy-theorist, but consider that we’ve spent the last two decades becoming- for good or ill- dependent on the internet for the most basic of services.  I literally haven’t paid taxes through the mail, or picked up any sort of form, or used a paper map in a decade.  And in the same time frame, we’ve seen our rights challenged without recourse, our law enforcement become more fascist and unchecked, and our political leaders become more radical and self-interested.  Now those corporate interests and political leaders are seeing a means to both nickle and dime everyone and keep a firm grip on their position by silencing dangerous ideas.  I’m not alone in that view either, and so many of us have given up that actual ground for lost and retreated to the internet as a free realm.

That’s worth fighting tooth and nail for, because if we lose our voice on the internet, we may not have a voice left at all.

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A tale of two sisters.

It’s a short tale.  Not even a tale, really.

I knew two girls from high school who were sisters.

The older one was my age.  Capital-H Hot, but nowhere in my sphere of friends and acquaintances.  Wouldn’t have given me the time of day then.  I saw her at a bar one night, the same night I’d won a karaoke contest, and feeling pretty good and a hundred bucks richer.   So I asked out, and her response was the nice “eye roll and leave” move.  I didn’t even rate a scathing remark.

The younger one claimed to have yelled “trenchcoat mafia” at me from a car once, which I don’t remember (and since I didn’t own a trenchcoat, I’m still not sure it was me).  Just as pretty as her sister, but always very kind to me; I didn’t really know her in school at all.  She did break up with my friend because he was shorter than her, but she’s unusually tall… and she felt so bad about it that she always comped us tickets to the theater if she was working.  All of us.

Like I said, it’s not much of a tale.  Just an observation I think about sometimes.  I’ve spent a lot of time wondering why one sister was so rude and one was the opposite, or if I somehow made an impression on one that I have no recollection of.


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Well that escalated quickly.

This Cliven Bundy thing got out of hand fast.

I don’t know jack shit about ranching or cattle grazing aside from a bunch of westerns I assumed were fictionalized.  The initial idea of the thing, which was that some rancher was letting his cows eat government grass, seemed reasonable to me.  There’s grass, and it’s government land (which in my mind is sort of public-use), and it looked like one of those “we’re not getting money out of this so fuck you buddy” situations.

Oh, but it’s been in dispute for two decades?  So he’s claiming “principles” as an excuse to not find a better solution.

And this is some kind of big deal out west?  I forgot in the 20 years since history class that cattle grazing and land rights have been a fucking THING since the western expansion.

Hey, and now there’s a standoff because some fucking militia followed the scent of crazy and decided that’s where they want to exchange bullets?  Those super-fucking-conservaterians that have been looking for an excuse to blow shit up because Obama and not-white, young, immigrant commies are ruining everything?

And now, because he has some attention, Bundy decided to share his 19th century wisdom?

All I can say is I was temporarily distracted from watching the Rob Ford trainwreck for a few minutes, and that’s something.

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The worst position to be in.

I’m pretty sure I’ve been blown off by the theater.  The hiring manager was, of course, not in when I went by, and the hipster assistant manager told me to check back in a couple of weeks.  They lost two guys a week ago and my understanding was they needed replacements quickly.  Not weeks down the road.

But what the fuck ever.  It’s the whole last year all over again.  I’m too experienced to be exploitable, but I’m not experienced enough to do the work I’ve done before.  Two years is not “experienced cook”.  Keyholder position means I’m owed a higher wage (or I’ll expect a higher wage) even though I was 23 and terrible at managing others.

I have a BA, which means I should be above minimum wage- but it was in art studio, so I’m a lazy idealist with no work ethic.  I’m 33, yet every job I’ve had has paid less somehow.  And I’ve never had an actual salary.  My two most recent employers exist and can be reached.  I have good references.  I’ve had my resume double checked by friends and there’s no glaring horror stories on there, no obvious mis-interpretable items.  I’m not using paper with the “fuck  you” watermark.

If anyone bothered to check past employers or references, or give me a fucking interview, I’d have a good shot at getting a job.  I keep telling myself that I don’t want to work with people who can’t be bothered to do things like that; that if someone doesn’t see the value on that resume, they probably won’t treat me well.

But I still gotta eat.

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